by Nancy Gallimore
“I don’t know how you do it,” a friend exclaimed as she watched me send a little foster puppy off to a new home. “This is exactly why I don’t foster dogs. I could never let any of them leave.”
I get this comment a lot. My partner, Jim, and I have provided a temporary home for dogs in need since well back into that other century. You know, the years that started with a 19 instead of a 20. If we were to tell you how we do it, it would start with a tour of our house out in the country filled with dog beds and crates. We draw a line just past the sanity level for dog occupancy and tiptoe all around it as foster dogs come and go.
But is that what it takes to be a good foster home? Do you have to jump ship on city life and head for green pastures? Do you need to house a huge number of dogs or cats? Absolutely not.
Let me introduce you to three experienced foster volunteers — dog fosters Lisa Coakley and Windy Bowman and cat foster Dacia Bush — for insight on the art of loving an animal and letting go.
Lisa Coakley
The Coakley family’s foster journey started during the pandemic when a plea for foster homes popped up on social media. With restricted public access, rescue groups needed to move dogs out of shelters and boarding facilities. Having adopted their two family dogs from rescues, Lisa Coakley was moved to help.
“I applied as a volunteer, and we quickly received our first foster dog from Animal Rescue Foundation,” said Coakley. From that beginning in 2020, the Coakley family now specializes as a maternity foster for moms and puppies and has hosted more than 80 dogs and puppies in their home, one little family at a time.
Fostering dogs is a group project, and Coakley’s husband and three children are very involved with their four-legged guests. “I think it’s really been a great learning experience for our kids,” said Coakley. “They’ve gained a better awareness of our community needs and how they can contribute, and they’ve learned a lot about compassion and patience.”
Windy Bowman
For Windy Bowman, fostering initially seemed to be a good way to see how a new dog would integrate into her home while also doing her part to help ease overcrowding in area shelters. “I saw a post on the Skiatook Paws and Claws (SPACAR) social media page asking for assistance with a dog at Skiatook Animal Control and thought I could help.”
Bowman, now a 10-year foster veteran, admits she never intended for fostering to become such an important part of her life, but she finds it very fulfilling. With daily help from her mother, who stops by to care for the dogs while Bowman is at work, she has found her niche by fostering dogs who need a little extra care.
“I take medical and behavioral foster cases to try to rehabilitate them and help them become adoptable,” explained Bowman. “It’s rewarding when a dog comes in broken and then, with time and patience, makes a magical transformation. In some cases, I might be the first person to show some of these dogs any version of love. I hope I make it easier for them to trust humans and set them up to succeed in a future home.”
Dacia Bush
Dacia Bush got involved with SPACAR as a volunteer caring for cats boarding at the organization’s headquarters. It wasn’t long before she took some of her charges home with her. Bush and her family have now cared for about 30 cats and kittens for SPACAR.
Bush says previous experience as a veterinary technician allows her to handle and treat foster cats with medical issues. “I can also take the spicy kittens that need lots of forced love to make them adoptable.” She keeps a few crates of various sizes to house new cats as they settle into her home, and SPACAR provides any supplies she might need.
How To Make a Difference
Although each of these volunteers now has a wealth of experience and each has found her individual strength in providing a temporary safe landing for countless dogs, puppies, cats, and kittens in need, they all have one very important thing in common. They each started with that first single dog or that first little kitten.
The need for foster homes in Oklahoma is great. As with many states in the middle and southern sections of the nation, the pet overpopulation problem is profound, and shelter overcrowding is a constant crisis. Take a quick glance through animal-rescue pages on social media, and you will see countless pleas for temporary housing to save pets who deserve a second chance. That is where foster families step in to make a huge difference.
If you have ever thought about opening your home to a foster dog or cat, Bowman offers some sound advice. “Don’t get overwhelmed, just take what works for your situation. In order to be a good foster, you don’t have to take the hard stuff like medical or behavior cases or litters of puppies. There are plenty of really good, laid-back dogs that just need a safe place to lay their heads.”
How To Let Go
And when it comes time to let your foster go? Our veterans have had a lot of experience on that side of the process too.
Coakley admits that her family has grown very attached to some of the foster dogs, but giving them up isn’t as hard as you think. “We get to meet the families and make sure it’s a good fit for the dog,” she explained. “We also stay in touch with a lot of the adoptive families and get pictures and updates, sometimes even years after they leave us.”
Bush says her kids are often sad when one of their foster cats leaves, but they know that with each adoption, they can help another cat in need. “Rescue groups couldn’t accomplish a fraction of what they do without fosters,” explained Bush. “Fostering literally saves lives. You will absolutely get attached, but that’s OK. These kitties need someone to love them until they find their forever homes.”
Bowman sums up her fostering mind-set. “Being afraid to foster because it’s too hard or too sad to let them go is like never starting a new workout routine, never changing a bad habit, or never falling in love because we are afraid of getting hurt or being bad at it. We have to get uncomfortable for a bit to find a new level of comfort, and that’s what it takes to step into fostering.”
In my personal experience through decades with our Dalmatian rescue, I have fostered hundreds of dogs and puppies. There have been challenges, there has been heartbreak, but those times are far outweighed by the triumphs and sheer fun of getting to love so many dogs. And the one thing that never fails to be a cherry on top? Watching a wagging tail heading off toward a wonderful new life and knowing you helped make that possible.
It’s that. That’s how we do it.
Writer’s note: The stories told by these three amazing foster families could have filled an entire magazine. Many thanks to them and all the foster families in our area who open their homes and hearts to help save so many wonderful pets who might otherwise be lost in overcrowded shelters or left to suffer as strays. These families are heroes, whether they have fostered 80 dogs or just one. Each little life makes a difference.
